If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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