How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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