kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
