My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize