At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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