Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at about main and main street
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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