it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize