My room smells like vodka and shame
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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