Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize