Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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