my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize