So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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