From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize