I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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