I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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