All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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