god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize