were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize