he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
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We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
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I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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