do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize