Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
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so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
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TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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