no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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