Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
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if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
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Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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