Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
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