i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
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