Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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