so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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