It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
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Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
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I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize