He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
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I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
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You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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