What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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