I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
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the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
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Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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