Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
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also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
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I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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