Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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