is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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