Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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