Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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