theres really not much difference between Christianity and Atheism, I just believe in one fewer god than you do, when you realize why you dismiss all the others you'll understand why i dismiss yours.
-Paraphrased and quoted from someone i don't want to look up at the moment
Haha believing in Catholic traditions is just the same as if your parents were like 'o i love you, but if you mess up Im putting you into the furance room and never letting you out.'
Go santa and hungover athest questions <3
I love how the ones who find this hilarious are the Atheists and the ones who are bitching how this isn't funny are the bible thumpers.
If this had been a text about Buddhism or something than you Christians wouldn't be whining now would ya? Get over yourself and let people believe what they want, calling atheist rude names doesn't make your beliefs right.
Why are people ignorant for not believing in god? Believers are just as ignorant for believing in something they have no proof for. Stop trying to press religion on people. That makes you seem closed minded and pushy. Keep your religion to yourself and let nonbelievers continue to do what they do. It's not your personal mission to make everybody believe. It's not your mission to turn people into nonbelievers.
a christian walks into a bar and asks for a beer, bartender charges him $3 and never brings him a beer. a few minutes later the christian asks the bartender to give him the beer he paid for, the bartender says "just because you cant see, feel or taste it, doesnt mean its not there!!"
"Guys, all religion is based off of Egyptian hieroglyphs that date back to 3000 BC anyhow"
You think all religion is based on Egyptian hieroglyphs?! What the hell?
This argument is fucking garbage, but if you insist... how can anyone believe in something that they're just supposed to beliveve because they heard it from somewhere? I thought that was called a conspiracy theory? Or an urban legend...
god doesn't exist. jesus doesn't exist. all your religions are wrong. islam, judaism, christianity, catholicism, all of them. wrong. Thousands of years ago, men who didn't really understand how the world worked made up a funky little thing called religion in order to cope with the world around them, the mysteries they couldn't explain, and the stuff we NOW know about. wake the fuck up.
oh boy, religious debate.
one book, passed down over thousands of years, originally copied by hand, made into millions and millions of copies..
ever played telephone?
To all those who think religious people can't laugh at a website like this...do you actually know any religious people in real life? Try talking to some. We're still human, you know. I may not get drunk and sleep around, but I'm still young, know how to have fun, and have a pretty good sense of humor.
"Bet she was ready for your hungover, athiest ass questions too! Seeing as she'd actually READ the Bible and knew what she was talking about."
More than half the people who call themselves "christians" or "catholics" don't know shit squat about the bible... They pull their "facts" from what they've been taught, not from actually reading and understanding it themselves.
"Seeing as she'd actually READ the Bible and knew what she was talking about."
HAHHAHAAHAAHHAA............................HAHAHAHAHAHA.....................
You might read harry potter too, but that doesn't make it any less fictional.
3:43. please do some research.
and by research i dont mean look up hieroglyphs, the dude/girl wasnt serious. however, DO look up the stories about the Egyptian sun god, and other ancient deities from other cultures.
Wow. Seriously people, why can't we all just live and let live. If you believe in God that's perfectly fine just don't go preaching it everywhere....if you don't and are atheist/agnostic/etc that's fine too, but don't preach it either, and people shouldn't judge people simply on their religious beliefs (or lack thereof)
Pastafarianism is retarded; the biting satire is absolutely hilarious and the fact that it carries legal weight is fantastic but the fact that people worship the FSM is profoundly stupid. Har har, oh what I get it, you show your contempt for religion by believing in a satirical diety that isn't even your own idea, how galactically fucking original and it ABSOLUTELY seems sincere and believeable *yawn*
Pascals Wager: Everyone will see the truth in the end...and atheists are fucking stupid anyway...better to believe and find out it's not real than not believe and find out that it's real. dumbasses.
Try a new one christians, this is illogical and cannot be taken seriously by any intelligent people. Smart people are atheists, weak & stupid believe in imaginary people. Santa, easter bunny, tooth fairy - you see a trend? Wake up and smell reality.
i wanted to laugh this morning.... you guys aren't funny. unless you count the guy who responded to people mocking his beliefs by calling another set of beliefs (or lack thereof) stupid.... hilarious
i think atheists are just a group of people looking for attention, therefore they try to start arguments with Christians. I dont understand why you care if you don't believe in a higher power anyway, why insult others for doing so?
frankly anyone whose really religious and believes in a God/hell and all that (aka believes in consequences) wouldnt be on this site laughing their asses off....
i remember going to church and my pastor saying "because you know Jesus you are wiser than everyone who doesnt" haha what a crock of shit! you better believe im an athiest now. btw listening to jesus freaks talk is always histerical
Thank you, 2:11 .. (The best part? His/her hungover atheist ass surely made more sense than the chick giving the report.)
I sent/submitted the original text, hahah stop having a full religious debate over it!
none of us are that holy, or we wouldn't be on this website laughing our asses off at all the inappropriate, but hilarious, bullshit that people get themselves into. so no need to argue.
11:14 and 11:28 its called pascal's wager, check it out. how are you covering your ass by believing in christianity when there are literally thousands of other religions in the world that have just as much chance of being right as yours does. please remember that no what you believe there will always be more people who believe something else.
Everyone will see the truth in the end...and atheists are fucking stupid anyway...better to believe and find out it's not real than not believe and find out that it's real. dumbasses.
You can't say that you're christian because you need to "cover all the bases" because christianity requires you to believe that god is real, not he might be, so if you are submitting to that logic, then you are submitting to agnosticism.. not christianity, except you're just being a pussy about it and saying that I'm too scared to go against christianity because of all the promising things they say... why don't you believe in santa? it's better to believe than not to belie
Why don't you all keep your fucking opinions about religion to your fucking selves?! It's really none of your business what anyone else believes or does not believe. Also, atheism is the belief that deities do not exist, which is almost like a religion, a religion of not believing...agnostic people just don't believe and don't really try to influence other people's belief systems. way to be! guys.
I would rather live my life and enjoy it than dedicate it to someone who might or might not exist. \n\nSome of you keep saying that you're Christian "just to be on the safe side", being a Christian is about believing in something higher than yourself, not because you don't want to die and go to hell. Some of you have no idea what religion really means. Also calling him "God" can refer to any of the "gods" that people believe in, you can tell you all read the Old Testam
Everyone will see the truth in the end...and atheists are fucking stupid anyway...better to believe and find out it's not real than not believe and find out that it's real. dumbasses.
OMG, YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FUCKING IDIOT TO EVER LIVE
and madddd respect to the dude that mosted this. mad. respect.
The discussion is pointless. There's only name-calling amongst two groups of people that are never going to open-minded enough to listen to the other side.
Quit arguing on a post that was meant to be funny on a website that is built for entertainment.
hey all you athiests and stuff, try being agnostic, its like atheism, except you done have to defend why or why dont you believe in religion, much more effective
@ 11:14, 11:28, 11:30
If you believe in God solely because of fear of hell or want of heaven, then you don't believe in him(/her/it) for any of the right reasons.
So get off your high horse and let people believe what they want.
(Isn't it the bible that says, "judge not, lest ye be judged," and "let he who is without sin cast the first stone"?)
what's wrong with defending the new testament with jesus...? whether you believe he existed or not, it's just an argument about a book and a person that may or may not exist. hard to win the argument either way. actually, impossible to win.. just look at our history.
maybe he/she meant the OLD testament.. cuz Jesus wasn't around then, so it wouldn't make sense to defend the OLD testament w/ jesus... but he "was" around for the NEW testament.. so it does make sense.
can we all just be rastafarians and smoke weed all day?
that way atheists and everyone else can just be high and not give a fuck...no one would fught over that stuff! i know id be too chill for that lol
haha this is a great text
its not suppose to be a religious battle of opinion fuckers.
stop taking these texts especially this one seriously
hey i go to church every sunday..and im laughing at this one..bc the person has a great sense of humor...and plus you don't see me forcing my religion on any of ya'll.
so lay off.
3:10pm "Frankly anyone whose really religious and believes in a God/hell and all that (aka believes in consequences) wouldnt be on this site laughing their asses off...."
Think again. Just cuz it's wrong doesn't mean it's not funny. And no, I'm not one of the ones getting pissy and bitchy here.
11:14 absolutely has a point- maybe he could just be a little more eloquent about it? It IS safer to believe than it is not too, covering all your bases right? I'm not going to keep smoking because there is a chance I won't die of lung cancer, I'm going to quit because then I'm 100% in the clear. Get it, Christianity is qutting smoking...Ha...
I'm a God loving Christian and LOL at 11:00!!
@ 11:14 (That's a somewhat nice film btw.)
@ 11:28
About your "safer" arguments.. Quoting Dawkings:
"Would you bet on God's valuing dishonestly faked belief (or even honest belief) over honest scepticism?"
11:14 Great "ambassador of Christ" you are.
If you continue treating others not as brother, but as enemies to be put down with vulgur and profane language, than you will go to hell just as the athiest will. However, if I'm right, and if your beleifs are nothing but paltry non-sense, you're just an asshole, and I'm just a guy trying to get by.
So much for your theory.
Ha, no I'm not scared into religion you dumbass. Does my post say anything about being scared into religion? I think not. Just saying it's a safer way to look at things rather than being atheist. I'm just stating the facts, idiot.
Honestly, I thought the religious battle that followed this was bar far funnier than the actual text, which I thought was pretty damned funny.
Woo, thanks everyone for making me laugh. (:
Guys, all religion is based off of Egyptian hieroglyphs that date back to 3000 BC anyhow, so why bother arguing?
People who believe something just because others believe it are moronic. Try watching Zeitgeist.
Comments
You must be Logged in to post a comment