Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
i now understand why vodka
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize