as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
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you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
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You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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