He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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