Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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