Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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