just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
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