Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
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Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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