the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize