So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
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I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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