just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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