Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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