You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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