I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
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I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
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